I Need Someone to Tell Me to Stand Up in the Morning

Image: Rory Bristol Original photo: Allen Watkin from London, UK (Lazy Cat) [CC BY-SA 2.0 ]

Image: Rory Bristol
Original photo: Allen Watkin from London, UK (Lazy Cat) [CC BY-SA 2.0 ]

I’m depressed. I’m not sad, I’m not separating myself from everyone else, I’m just depressed. Mostly, this means that I wake up, and follow my normal routine until it fails. Namely, I wake up, check the time, start planning my day. Normally, this is the part where I get out of bed and do stuff. Lately? Notsomuch. I fall asleep before I finish planning my day.

After a couple of days struggling to start working on time, I realized I had a problem. Jenny had to come wake me up on Saturday. I had been in bed like three extra hours. We talked about it a bit, and decided to work to be pro-active together. All I need is for Jenny to say, “Stand up.”

That’s it. It’s not that I’m lazy. It’s not that I’m sad, or tired, even. I just don’t wake up with enough brain to tell me I’m going to fall back asleep if I don’t stand up. Pretty simple. I just need one thing, and my day is back on track, right from the start.

Huzzah for figuring my brain out a little bit!

Also, a follow-up about telling my therapist “no”… I chickened out when I realized she was going on vacation. I’ll have to do it later. I didn’t want to ruin her vacation with my complaints, and she didn’t tell me how I was feeling once that whole session! So, no harm done. Now… where’s my mug? I need caffeine.

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    • If it comes to that I will. Feel free to call any time, though. Miss you. I know phones work both ways, but I also don’t work in an office or raid anymore. Skype is also a good option. Hugs.

      • I am hoping this week that it settles down. I’ve been working 12-16 hours days. Blah. Love ya.

  1. Ryno

    I often don’t have enough energy. The last week and a half or so I have slept for like 14ih hours a day…. Not proud of it but it’s true. I don’t know if it’s the season change or what, but today I have decided to make a true effort to pay attention to how i feel and not allow myself to just “sleep it away”. Thank you for the post Rory. I know at least some what how you feel. And just letting depression hold you back with no self effort to change is very bad. I chose to change this and no allow depression or anything else to dictate how I live.

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